Gold Party

Years ago, I went to a lingerie party. Not proud of it, but there it is. Years before that, I went to a Mary Kay cosmetic party, and years before that, a Tupperware party. So, hey, I've been around the block. I'm no virgin!

But a gold party? "Bring your old gold jewelry," she said, "the stuff you don't want anymore. You know, broken chains, singleton earrings, or pieces you no longer wear." (She must not have access to my jewelry box or she would know that I have very little of the 'real stuff'!) "I went to one last week," she continued. "Took in a handful of gold and would have been happy with 50 bucks. I went home with 450!!"

"I think I'll pass," I answered. "I mean, if it's worth that much now, I'll just hang on to it. Might be worth even more someday."

"Well," she replied, "I figure it this way. People don't want to invest in stocks right now so they're looking for a place to put their money. Gold is it. But when the economy recovers, stocks will go up and gold will go down. Might as well get while the getting is good."

I didn't tell her where I think the economy is going, but it's not back up. And gold probably is a good investment, but I don't like the way it's mined. Odd, isn't it, how much value we put in a relatively useless yellow metal? It's good for jewelry and coins but not much more -- too soft for tools. And you can't eat it, drink it, or use it for shelter.

I hung up the phone, feeling as if I had been kicked in the stomach. How could we have dug our way so far down into the hole and still not notice the bad air? Well, I'm hanging onto my gold, the little that I do have, and I'm putting my coins in a jar every night. Just another insurance policy.